Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
