WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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