Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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