check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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