Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
