I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
