The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
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