Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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