so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
