I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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