Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
So much Jack, so little girl.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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