This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
