u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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