She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
