Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
