Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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