I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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