how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Randomize
