So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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