is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
