LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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