is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize