We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
