speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Come see our sink grown plant.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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