I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
