My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
We need a shit load of segways right now
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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