just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
