The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
