lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
