Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
