kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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