used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
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