So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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