I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
