guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
FUCK WHALES
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
