Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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