Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Boobs are out for the taking
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
