in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
