I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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