so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
