i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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