and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
