I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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