I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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