what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
she smelled like a LAN party
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Randomize