some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
how does that bad decision feel?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
