guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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