Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
