Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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