his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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